Classroom of the Elite V17: Ch 2 part 1
It was 5:30 pm when I got home and I was patiently waiting for Yōsuke to come. I got a notification on my mobile phone.
[Can I come and hang out with you now?]
A message from Kei, my girlfriend, with a cute little cat stamp. My meeting with Yōsuke is at 7.30pm, which is very soon.
[Why don’t we have some food while we’re at it?]
Before I can reply, a postscript comes. It seems that she wants to have dinner with me. In response to Kei’s text, I sent a short message saying that I was ready.
“If that’s the case, I’ll have to make something.”
I could serve yesterday’s leftovers, but if I want to make something quick that Kei likes, I’ll go with...
I open the fridge, stare at the contents and think about it, when the doorbell rings.
When I opened the front door, I saw Kei smiling at me.
I was a little surprised, but I didn’t panic and invited her in. Now that our relationship is public knowledge, it’s great that I don’t have to worry about when to let her in.
“You’re early.”
As she takes off her shoes, Kei goes into the room with a familiar movement.
“I texted you before I got in the elevator.”
She said that she was going to come and visit me anyway, but that her plans were secondary to my own. Once the cooking is finished, Kei sits down on the floor by the table. “Because I’ve been in Kiyotaka’s room so much lately, I’ve become so used to it, it’s like my own room.”
“I’m glad to hear it. On the other hand, I haven’t been invited to your room.”
“Oh, yeah? That’s a bit embarrassing and... well, maybe one day when
I feel like it!”
She didn’t give me a straightforward yes, but when you’re in a girl’s room, there’s bound to be circumstances. Let’s not pursue the matter too deeply.
“So, what do people say about our relationship, Kei?”
“The girls? I think they’ve been surprisingly easy to accept. I mean... nevermind.”
She tried to say something, but it was unclear. I was a bit curious, so I pressed the matter.
“What is it?” “Well, you know. There is a so-called status attached to Hirata Yōsuke.
A lot of girls question why I would let go of such a thing.”
I see. It means they don’t understand why she went to the trouble of switching to a guy with no status.
It’s certainly not surprising that they would be so open about the comparison between Yōsuke and I.
In a way, Kei’s been affected by it. She was supposed to be the one who broke up with Yōsuke, but it may be thought that she was the one who was dumped.
If the man you switch to is more or less irrelevant, you can’t blame them for their suspicions.
“But that’s only part of the story. Kiyotaka’s reputation has been an anagonobori recently.”
“The expression you’re looking for is ‘unaginobori’. ‘Anago’ is wrong.”
(TL Note: ‘Unaginobori’ is a Japanese idiom referring to something rising rapidly, like eels do. ‘Anagonobori’ is wrong because ‘Anago’ refers to conger eels.)
I wondered if she did it on purpose, but then Kei smiled at me.
“I know that much, as expected.”
“You must have an excellent tutor.”
“Thank you for everything, sensei. And thanks to my secret private lessons, my grades are going up.”
Gradually, Kei’s academic performance improved and at the beginning of September, her OAA showed that her academic performance had risen to a 48; a C.
It means that she has finally reached the average level of knowledge as a student.
After a few minutes of idle chatter, I sat up and headed back to the fridge.
“I’m going to make an omelette, would you like one?”
When I asked her without looking back, Kei immediately made a happy noise.
“Eat, eat! Please make the ketchup a bit thicker, chef.”
It’s not the first time I’ve served Kei a home-cooked meal like this.
After we started going out, we had regular opportunities to have meals in my room. So far, Kei has shown little inclination to cook on her own, but that’s alright. If she wants to cook, she can do so, and it doesn’t matter if she’s a man or a woman. I don’t mind cooking, and Kei is happy to eat. Kei likes to talk and talk and talk, but I’m not the best at making conversation, so she tries to liven things up a bit. I think we have a good balance.
I get the eggs, ketchup, chicken, and butter out of the fridge, get some salad oil from the shelf, and I’m ready to go. I took out the frozen rice and started to defrost it in the microwave. In the meantime, I prepared the onions.
I wanted to add some carrots, but unfortunately, I didn’t have any in stock. As I put the onions on the cutting board and picked up the knife, I felt a presence behind me. Kei came up to me, snuggling against my back.
“What are you doing?”
As it is somewhat dangerous, I stopped moving and asked only with words.
“I’m just watching~”
Kei answered, but since her profile is stuck on my back, it shouldn’t be possible to see what’s going on. “You can ignore me. I’ll stay put.”
“Right, got it.”
I did as I was told and continued with my work. On the cutting board, I cut the onions into 5 mm cubes. While I was cutting the onions, Kei stayed close to my back, never leaving me. This time, I put down the knife and reached for the bowl to crack the eggs, but at that moment, Kei wrapped her arms around my waist and hugged me. “What are you doing this time?”
“Hmm? I’m just watching.”
“It doesn’t look to me like you’re just watching very closely, does it?
It’s more like sabotage.”
She didn’t seem to mind, although I did prod her that I was losing some efficiency.
“Oh, I’m so happy. Is there anything else that makes you happy?” She murmured briefly, and her arms tightened even more in a hug. She looked rather satisfied.
“That’s cheap happiness. Isn’t there any other kind of happiness that’s more amazing? Buying what you want, watching the TV you’ve always wanted.”
“It’s not enough to make me happy.”
“That was a random remark, but you actually have that.”
“No, I don’t. Even if I did, I wouldn’t want it. The happiness I have now is enough for me.”
If you’re happy with this, I can’t say anything more.
“May I resume cooking?”
It is very inconvenient to continue in this position.
“Huh? What should I do?”
She looked at me and smiled, glancing at me and looking into my eyes.
“I’d like some kind of reward for being so quiet?”
“There’s chocolate in the fridge.”
“Buh. That’s not what I meant. There’s something off about that. It’s not that I don’t like it. I’ll be waiting quietly.”
Satisfied, Kei pulled away and sat down on the bed.
“Well, now I can concentrate on making omelettes for a while.” Kei waits for the food to be ready, alternating between her mobile phone and the TV, and then the two of us sit around the table for a slightly earlier dinner than usual.
“By the way, about Shinohara-san...”
I didn’t ask her to talk about it, but she did and started talking about the matter with no prompt.
“I’m sorry about that, but that revelation really got to her and she wouldn’t talk to me.”
“That’s fine, I didn’t think she would...”
People have different tastes and preferences when it comes to good and bad looks, but generally speaking, those who are considered to be better than others make condescending remarks about those who are considered to be inferior. It’s not an uncommon occurrence, it happens all over the world. More often than not, there’s no malice in it, they’re just saying what they think.
“Do you and the others hate Shinohara?”
“I don’t dislike her at all. Shinohara-san is a funny girl, she’s popular for making people happy.”
“I see. So that’s why she was unconsciously attracted to Ike.”
“I think so... we were laughing and talking about things that would hurt if anyone heard.” She murmurs regretfully, as if she is sorry. “Are you going to hate me for being so mean to her?”
“I won’t deny that others say bad things about others. It’s harder to find someone who doesn’t speak ill of others at all, to varying degrees.” I don’t like the senior members of the club because they are too heavyhanded. I hate bossy teachers. It is good to have a place to complain about one or two such things. If you want to talk about appearance or your academic performance, you can do that too.
“That being said, we have to avoid bad gossip getting into the ears of the person concerned.”
“I know...”
“It must have been a shock to find out that the exception, Kushida, was the one who leaked it. Telling someone is always a risk.”
The leaked story from Kushida that they had been joking about her looks naturally hurt Shinohara deeply.
And that’s not all. Shinohara’s friends who didn’t have a good impression of her, her boyfriend Ike, and Ike’s friends, naturally don’t think well of Kei and her friends.
This time, Shinohara may go around prominently speaking ill of Kei, Matsushita and Mori.
Once the negative cycle has started, it takes a lot of effort to stop it.
“So, you didn’t just feel bad, did you? What’s going on?”
I’ve had some light explanations from Matsushita, but I have to hear it from Kei too.
“I misunderstood several times... but I tried to solve it through discussions about what I hurt. I’ve tried to talk it out, but there’s nothing I can do about it at the moment.”
“Unapproachable.”
“That’s it... but I guess it’s my fault in the end?”
It seems that Kei and her friends have tried to repair their broken relationship with Shinohara in their own way. “So, how do you think we can make up for this?”
“You’re asking me?”
“It’s not a surprise. You’re sure to come up with a good plan.”
Kei also has the same problem as Yōsuke, although so far no breakthrough has been found.
“I’m thinking about it. Give me some more time.” I’ll tell her that for now and postpone my answer.
“Listen, I know this is going to sound a little crazy, but can I ask you something?”
As I listened, she looked up at me with a curious look on her face and asked.
“Didn’t Kiyotaka expel Sakura-san based on OAA in the special exam? If...” When our eyes met, Kei choked on her words. “It’s alright. It’s nothing.”
“If you’d finished last in the OAA. You’re wondering what I’d have done?”
Kei’s eyes widened in an obvious way.
“As with Ike, there are similar grades but the difference in friends is overwhelming. I wouldn’t have expelled you.”
“What if I didn’t have any friends? What if I was in the lowest caste of girls?”
I started to feel uneasy and the words came out in rapid succession. “That argument is pointless. If we use that assumption, then the person called Karuizawa Kei is a completely different person. If that were the case, then you and I would not have developed into the relationship we have now.” “That’s... I see. Maybe... If I wasn’t dating you, would I have been expelled?”
Although she understood that it was a meaningless discussion, she couldn’t help but ask.
“I suppose you would if you’d had the ability you placed yourself in.”
“Oh...”
“I can understand how it might hurt your feelings, but it’s not you. That’s not who you are. You were bullied and hurt, and in order to turn things around in high school, you established yourself as an independent girl. You used Yōsuke to meet and date me. That’s what you are, Karuizawa Kei.” When I answered that much, Kei’s lips pursed in obvious frustration.
“I’ll protect you, no matter what happens. That’s the right thing to do.”
“I see.”
I want it to be me who declares that I will protect Karuizawa Kei no matter what the situation is.
I learnt that there is no need for logic.
I laid her head down on my lap and shifted to patting her head to put her in a good mood. After a few minutes of watching her curl up on my lap like a cat, Kei opened her mouth, still in the same position.
“Hey, Kiyotaka. I don’t think it’s wrong that you cut Sakura-san. There is nothing wrong with that. But was it really right for Horikita-san to leave Kushida-san in the class? She’s definitely an obstacle, isn’t she?” She is the one who has caused the rift in the class. Kei feels that the disadvantages of her not dropping out of school are significant. It’s nothing unusual, it’s a natural reaction.
We all have questions. But it’s not easy to speak up when time is running out. And in the end, you think it’s better to save yourself. It was around the two days off after the exams that the enthusiasm began to wane. Some of us wonder if we’ve done the right thing, some of us are glad we weren’t expelled. Others are terrified that they might be next.
“What does Kushida have that Airi lacks? Do you know what it is?”
“What? Study and sport? Kushida-san’s pretty good at everything.”
“For superficial reasons, yes. But that’s not the point.”
“What do you mean?”
“It’s a possibility that she will become an important piece in Horikita’s awakening as a leader. She could be a partner to Horikita, not Yōsuke or Kei.”
“Kushida-san will...?”
“I don’t think Horikita herself fully understands. She just trusted her instincts in a tight situation with no time to spare.” “That’s what she has and Sakura-san doesn’t.”
“The perspective that only Kushida has, the thought that only Kushida has, the remarks that only Kushida has. These are elements that can be used with or without popularity. And that’s what drives Horikita.” Although she is convinced of a certain point, Kei herself is not convinced.
Is that a natural reaction? This is an indeterminate future.
It’s just a theory that assumes Horikita was right in making that choice.
“She knows that she will be resented by Haruka and those close to her.
But the results won’t come in a day or two. We’ll just have to wait and see.”
“But aren’t you more hated by Hasebe-san than she is?”
“Yeah.”
It was difficult to get unanimity in that situation when time was running out. No matter how many times Horikita mentioned others, it was almost impossible to make them unanimous. And the negative class points were an unacceptable reality. If that happened, there would be no way for me to help.
“It would be easy if we could say what the result is, what the conclusion is, what the answer is. But the reality is that you can’t.”
“You mean Horikita-san?”
“Suppose there is a hurdle in front of you that is so high that you may or may not be able to jump over it. If you try and fail, you might not jump over it, you might fall over it, you might scrape your leg, or if you’re unlucky, you might break a bone.”
You can imagine the hurdles that stand in the way of your ability. “What do you think you need to do to make sure you get over that hurdle?”
“Ummm... lots of practice before you jump?”
“What if I don’t practice?”
“The only way to do that is to do it on the spot, right? That seems to be the only way anyways...”
“It’s the same thing. Horikita couldn’t stop running and tried to jump over the hurdle in front of her.”
“So Horikita-san failed the challenge and fell down?”
“No, you’ve just leapt and hit a hurdle. How bad is my injury, will I fall? Will I be okay or will I be seriously injured? That is yet to be determined.”
It was easy to avoid the hurdle. All you had to do was not fly and take short diversions. This is where I’m tempted to watch Horikita, though. Once again I found myself wondering how I could have imagined this when I first started at the school.
“That’s how it is. But I’m still not convinced by Horikita-san’s decision. She broke her promise. And she even said she would protect Kushida-san.”
It is true that there is an aspect of intimidation, but it is also true that until now, discipline in Horikita’s class has been too lax.
By throwing a stone here, we know that our personal safety is not guaranteed. Of course, their trust in Horikita will have been strongly shaken, but this can be made up for in the special exams ahead, provided they continue to pursue their goal of getting closer to Class A. By the time we were finished talking, it was around 7pm.
I cleaned up the plates and went to the kitchen to wash them while I was at it.
“Hey, hey. Come and have a chat with me over here.”
“I’m going to do the washing up now, then I’ll see.” “What? Then it’ll be half past seven.”
She complained because that would be the time when Yōsuke arrived. I listened to her and started to wash the dishes. She was quiet for a while, but gradually lost patience and started demanding again. “Hey hey, come here. Come on.. come here? Can you come here?” As she said this, she patted the bed with the palm of her hand three or four times.
“It’s no use...”
I would have liked to have washed the dishes before Yōsuke came to my room, but I gave up on that.
As I sat down on the designated spot, Kei happily poked me on my right cheek with her index finger.
“You’re so soft and smooth for a boy. What do you do?”
“It’s just lotion.”
Considering the strain on teenage skin, I believe that further care is necessary than the bare minimum.
“Hmmm...”
Although she was convinced, she didn’t really care, she just wanted to touch me and wouldn’t stop poking me on the cheek.
I grabbed Kei’s hand and pulled her to me and took her lips.
I thought she would be surprised, but she seemed to have been waiting for it and laughed nervously.
“I’ve been waiting for you to make a move since I came to your room today.”
“So that’s it.”
I have to say I’m still a bit naive in that area. Our lips met again and again in near silence. The repeated kisses tasted like an omelette, a rather unusual experience.
“Love...”
I gently held Kei in my arms and was met with a quiet silence. It was a pleasant moment, not an awkward one.
For how many minutes did we just hug each other?
As if to break the silence, the chime of the door rang. Suddenly jolted back to reality, Kei hurriedly distanced herself in a moment of sudden embarrassment. There is no hurry, the door is locked, but well... I know the feeling. After allowing Kei some time to settle down, we both greeted Yōsuke. Yōsuke, who was still in uniform, came to visit me in my room. “I went to Keyaki Mall with my senpais after school.”
That’s what Yōsuke reports when he realizes I’ve been focusing on the uniform.
“Come in, come in, come in.” Yōsuke smiled happily at Kei, who acted as if it were her own room.
I knew that he was happy to see Kei’s cheerfulness and purity now because he had watched over her more than anyone else since she started school.
“Pardon the intrusion.”
After carefully arranging his shoes, he came into the room and sat down as I served him tea.
“Thank you.”
“So what do you want to talk about?”
I encouraged him to talk to me, as it is no use holding them back for too long. Of course, the content is all very predictable.
“Yes. It’s about our class. I’m sure you’re well aware of this, but I thought it might be dangerous to go into the sports festival like this. The girls, in particular, may find it difficult to work together.”
“I’m sure Karuizawa-san knows more about this than I do,” Yōsuke said, looking at her.
“I was talking to Kiyotaka earlier about what happened with Shinoharasan. To be honest, no one’s really focused on the sports festival at the moment.”
Because they’re just starting to reform their relationship as friends.
“So I was wondering if you had any good ideas. I need your help, Kiyotaka.”
The same Kei who came to me for help earlier also gives me that look. If so, don’t hesitate to talk to me.
“Yōsuke, did you ask anyone else for this advice before me?”
“What? No, this is the first time I’ve asked anyone. I didn’t want to talk about it inadvertently, because I didn’t want people to know that I was trying to fix it.”
It would be nice if they were willing to help him, but if they knew that he was trying to befriend them, they might be wary of him. There is a danger that people will think that there is an ulterior motive behind the kind words.
“And why did you ask me?”
“I thought I’d like some direction.”
“So, from now on, the first person to talk to is me, but not the leader of the class, Horikita?”
“But I think Horikita-san has her hands full with Kushida-san’s case right now. To bring up the issue of other classmates here and now is...” “If I had been dealing with Kushida, would you have approached
Horikita?”
“I don’t know about that... I might have ended up speaking to Kiyotaka about it anyways.”
He imagined what it would be like, and then he admitted it honestly. “Horikita-san is doing a great job. But I knew that Kiyotaka would be able to see the big picture and make the right decisions. I just think you can give me the right answer, that’s all.”
“I told you that at the last special exam. You can’t always rely on me.
Even if you’re unsure, you have to go through this process of talking to Horikita first.”
“But...”
“It’s a burden. You don’t always get a solution. That’s why we don’t rely on any one person. Do you really think that makes Horikita a leader in the true sense of the word? How about a leader like Ryūen, Sakayanagi or Ichinose? Don’t you think they would be the first to raise concerns, even in the midst of dealing with other issues?”
The important thing is to rely on each other and to be relied on.
Horikita and the class are about to grow through success and failure.
“Failure is an experience. Everyone has started out with a problem. Of course Horikita isn’t at a high stage yet, but it’s only due to a huge lack of experience.”
“I get that, but...”
The process of discussing and searching for different solutions should not be omitted before deciding on a solution.
“I’d like you to bring it up with me only after she answers first, even though she has her hands full with Kushida.” “I see what you mean, Kiyotaka.”
Taking it seriously and nodding a few times, Yōsuke processed the meaning of the words in his mind.
“It’s important to gain experience in failure, but this isn’t the same as a test score. I don’t think it’s just because you got a bad score that you should try harder next time. It’s an important thing that deals with the student’s mind. If a cracked relationship is broken by an immature decision, that’s a problem that can’t be undone.”
This area is quintessential to Yōsuke. He didn’t bring up the subject just for the sake of getting an easy answer.
“It’s the right decision. But I think you’re reading into it a little too much. It’s probably true that there are cracks in the friendship between classmates. And it’s certainly true that frictions and quarrels between friends, or bad language, can lead to irreversible problems.”
If it escalates from bad language to harassment, ignoring, and bullying, it can create the worst case scenario. But that’s really the worst case.
“Kei, is your feud with Shinohara in a truly dangerous state?”
“Hmmm... when you put it that way, well, it’s an extension of the fight, isn’t it? It’s hard for me to say anything bad about it because I’m in the position of the assailant. I’m not harassing her or anything, and I don’t think too many girls even hold negative feelings about Shinohara-san.” By taking it too seriously, she was stirring up unnecessary anxiety.
That was my view.
“Besides, you’re not going to let Horikita solve this alone, are you?”
“Of course not. If there’s anything I can do, I’ll do it.”
“Good then. I’ve calculated that if the two of you working together with Horikita at the center, you can get through most things.”
However, these words alone wouldn’t be enough to completely remove his anxiety, so I’ll add something important. “Of course, there will be things that can’t be solved even if you cooperate with Horikita. In that case, I’ll lend a hand.”
If the backup was perfect, both Yōsuke and Kei would be able to act without hesitation, and they looked convinced, but Yōsuke still had something on his mind, and his expression wasn’t completely clear. We exchanged information for a while, and when 8:00 p.m. approached, I urged them to leave.
“If you don’t mind, I’d like to talk to you alone for a bit.” On his way out, Yōsuke, who felt he couldn’t leave it like that, cut me off.
“Okay. I’ll go home first then.” Said Kei as she put her shoes on and waved goodbye.
After the door closes, Yōsuke looks back again.
“Kiyotaka Tomorrow, I’ll bring your story to Horikita-san. However, do you have a clear path in mind for us at this point?”
“Honestly, Yōsuke, I don’t have any ideas for an immediate solution to the Haruka and Kushida matters. I’m hoping that you guys can discuss it and lead us to the upper hand.”
“So you’re saying that’s not the case regarding... Mii-chan?” “In a manner of speaking. It will take time, but we have a chance. If you’re in a hurry, there’s always the possibility of forcing rough treatment.”
“Rough treatment? If there’s anything we can do, I think we should do it.”
Yōsuke reacts to the mention of the girl who likes him with the same attitude as the others.
“I told you it’s a rough treatment. I don’t recommend it.”
“What kind of method is that?”
“That would be for Yōsuke to go see Mii-chan and respond to her feelings.”
Yōsuke reacts in a way that I never thought he would.
“Actually, I like you too, Mii-chan. I want you to go out with me. If we can get that kind of conversation going, she’ll come to school tomorrow, right?”
I was a little reluctant to suggest it, but it was the only solution I could come up with right now.
“If this wasn’t Yōsuke, I wouldn’t be talking about this kind of plan either. But I thought it might be possible for you, since you’ve been asked by Kei to lie about your relationship with her.”
“Indeed.” Yōsuke muttered, but his expression did not brighten. “The reason why Karuizawa-san and I ostensibly agreed to go out is because neither of us had any romantic feelings in between. It’s not the same as pretending to respond to Mii-chan’s feelings and going out with her. I’ll only hurt her deeply later.”
“I don’t mean to endorse this idea, but, you’re right, it’s not the same. We don’t know at what stage Mii-chan fell in love with you, but we can’t deny the existence of other students, including anyone else, who had romantic feelings for you right from the start of school. In other words, at the cost of protecting you from bullying by going out with Kei, there might have been girls who were hurt because they were indirectly rejected because of
that lie.”
“That’s...”
If Kei and Yōsuke were seriously dating, it would be a legitimate reason. But since they weren’t, there wasn’t much difference in what they were doing, even though the circumstances were different.
“What if Mii-chan came crying and clinging to you right now and told you that she can’t go to school anymore unless you go out with her? Would you be able to say no to her?”
Yōsuke choked at my words. He probably wouldn’t be able to make such a choice.
“If you can’t say no, there are two choices you can make. You can either tell her that you don’t like her and go out with her, or you can lie and say that you liked her too and go out with her.”
If true love can grow in the midst of all this, it can be brought to the best possible end.
“I still don’t think that’s what I should do.”
I can understand what he’s saying here, but it’s the emotional side still getting in the way.
“It’s just a rough, forced solution. It’ll take time, but we’re at the stage where we’re planting the seeds.”
“I understand. I’ll see what I can do. Then again, Kiyotaka is really strong. You don’t seem to be dragging up the fact that Sakura-san dropped out of school in the slightest.”
There was no sign of sadness or anger from the quietly speaking Yōsuke.
“I still have the feeling of that time in my... hands.” He looks down at his outstretched hands and stares at the palms of them. “It’s the sensation of my fingertips touching the tablet and pressing my approval. I can’t forget it.” Yōsuke, who works day and night for his classmates, doesn’t show much weakness. But he’s struggling to put the blame for Airi’s expulsion on the same level as me.
“I know what you were thinking at that time. There was no way you would have agreed to expel Airi, who had done no harm in the exam. But still, you persevered. You could have said at the last minute that you didn’t agree with it, but you restrained yourself from saying it.”
If he complained about the situation and made them face it, our classmates would regain their composure. A broader perspective, narrowed by the pressure of time running out, would have made unanimity impossible. “Our class must move up to Class A. That’s the most important thing, I told myself.”
You know it in your head, but you can’t convince yourself of it. I guess that’s about it.
“We have three students that are absent. I wonder how long this will continue. Seeing the reality that students with lower grades are being cut, it really did induce some fear within the students. The cheerful class we had last week is still like a lie, isn’t it?”
Even though they’re working towards a solution, they’re probably still suffering and answering to themselves about the same thing over and over again.
“I’m well aware that you’re not happy with the choices Horikita and I have made. But we have to accept that. We just have to understand how good our class is right now and bite the bullet. That’s why Horikita needs a lot of support. Sometimes you choose the right path, and sometimes you choose the wrong path. And there will be times when you choose an uncertain path.” Even if he told them, not everything could be digested in Yōsuke’s mind.
“I-I-I should have chosen to r-run out of time... and...” Yōsuke’s shoulders shake slightly as he can no longer hold it in.
It’s not like Yōsuke wants to think about sacrificing someone else. But the fact that he was able to make a decision in that situation is a definite sign of growth.
“Am I getting stronger, or have I broken down? If it happens again, I’m afraid I won’t know what decisions I’ll make.”
I couldn’t see his face because he was looking down, but he rubbed his eyes once with his sleeve before raising his head.
“I’m sorry for being so weak, even though I’m sure you’re in more pain, Kiyotaka.”
“It’s okay. Both Horikita and I were saved by Yōsuke many times in the special exam. It’s going to be a much tougher battle from now on. I hope you will continue to lend your strength to the class.” Yōsuke nodded. He would still be heartbroken, but he still smiled slightly. Yōsuke reached for the front door, but stopped himself.
“Thank you for everything today.”
“Do you hold a grudge against me for expelling Airi?”
Unlike the other students, Yōsuke didn’t show it outwardly, but it wouldn’t be surprising if he did.
“If you only look at that point, yes, I do. But I believe in you.” He thought to himself as he put it into words, but then added more as if he wasn’t convinced. “No. I want to believe in you.”
If it was a kind of delusional belief, Yōsuke’s thoughts would be dangerous. However, there is definitely a will behind his eyes. A firm demand that I’m worthy to be believed in, and I wouldn’t ever betray him . “Well then, good night.”
I suppose I could have removed some of Yōsuke’s burden, but on the contrary, I might have given him a new one. It would be convenient if I could take this opportunity to thoroughly drain the negative emotions out of him. I’m not sure how much of an effect this will have, but I’m sure we’ll have to follow through step by step.